"Walk with me." It wasn't said suggestively. i tumbled out of his side of the truck as he pulled my hand to catch up to his fast pace. Winding through the trees, we came to the small enclosed gazebo just beside the parks edge. Whipping round to face me, he placed his palms upon my cheeks. "Do you love me? Honestly and for real?" I could only shake my head in agreement.
"Will you do something for me?" his eyes were burning with the intensity.
"You know i would. Anything."
Gently, he tugged me closer to his body. I resisted. Tugging gently on the collar of my shirt, he lowered his lips to mine, breathing in the intoxicating exhilation. Tenderly caressing the curves of my shirt, his kisses moved lower. Sharp gasps of air escaped my mouth. i couldn't believe what i was doing. but in the still of my subconscious, i was waiting for that shining magical moment, when i would emerge a woman, and he would never consider leaving me.
2 months later
"oh...my... Crap. Geeze! What. The. Heck. Were. You. Thinking?!!" the tiny little strip turned pink as i held it out before my bewildered eyes. How had this happen? oh, right. i remember.
shrugging off the nausea, i made my way to my bedroom, ready to pick up any large heavy object and take a good swing at something breakable.
"uhhhhhhh.....oh snap." the waves were coming harder now. how was i going to tell him? was i going to tell him? was i going to tell anybody? i left for school in 3 days, and was traveling all the way to Vivian, a whole 30 minutes away. that wouldn't provide enough privacy for anybody. oh my gosh. How am i going to tell Ty?
Glancing at his phone, Ty recovered the one missed call. Flipping through new texts, one in particular caused a peculiar expression to cross the handsome face. dialing the all too familiar number, Ty rubbed at his temples for comfort. Finally a voice was heard on the other line.
"ASHTON! Whats going on? Are you sick? Hurt? Do i need to come home?"
in seconds, the panic melted to a somber numb that washed over his person. dropping to the floor, ty sat back in astonishment. Their lives were over.
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
Monday, August 1, 2011
Ty & Ash
I couldn't really help the emotions coursing through my body. Love lost is love won, but Ty was my whole world. Without him there was nothing left for me to do. I could go to school and really buckle down into a career, yet there was still that haunting feeling that everything was going to change for the worse, and that was something i couldn't bear facing.
Ticking off the last hours of summer pierced my body with agony. Burning behind my eyelids were the tears of remorse. Days and weeks of the calendar flickered through the air, tangible with tantric scenes seared into the ridges of my mind. Clutching the sides of my chest, I waited for him to pull the truck around to the front door. Melodramatic as it was, tonight was our last dinner, detailed by the stiff silence. Everything had been uncomfortable. Neither of us had barely uttered a word, nor looked at each other. Of course in the backs of our minds, it was completely ridiculous, we would obviously be seeing each other. Finality just must have that effect on people.
Rumbling to attention, the cherry red auto was waiting for me to come inside. Little mournful drops of woe started sprinkling from the sky, sort of an omen capturing the moment. He pulled around to our spot in the grove. In the dark, i could feel his eyes searching out my face, his thumb running worried circles onto the back of my hand and fingers. "What have you been hiding from me all night?" he whispered over the rain.
i shook my head. speaking was only going to force the tears.
Slowly pulling me to his side of the car, he wrapped his well formed arms around the shudders that were threatening to compel the sobs just caught in my throat. "Shhh... Baby, it's all gonna be OK! I promise. Don't be so upset. We'll make this work."
I batted my wet eyelashes up at him. "I love you." Blinking a few times up at the ceiling, one glimmering tear shone in the moonlight, emotions unknown surging like electricity.
Ticking off the last hours of summer pierced my body with agony. Burning behind my eyelids were the tears of remorse. Days and weeks of the calendar flickered through the air, tangible with tantric scenes seared into the ridges of my mind. Clutching the sides of my chest, I waited for him to pull the truck around to the front door. Melodramatic as it was, tonight was our last dinner, detailed by the stiff silence. Everything had been uncomfortable. Neither of us had barely uttered a word, nor looked at each other. Of course in the backs of our minds, it was completely ridiculous, we would obviously be seeing each other. Finality just must have that effect on people.
Rumbling to attention, the cherry red auto was waiting for me to come inside. Little mournful drops of woe started sprinkling from the sky, sort of an omen capturing the moment. He pulled around to our spot in the grove. In the dark, i could feel his eyes searching out my face, his thumb running worried circles onto the back of my hand and fingers. "What have you been hiding from me all night?" he whispered over the rain.
i shook my head. speaking was only going to force the tears.
Slowly pulling me to his side of the car, he wrapped his well formed arms around the shudders that were threatening to compel the sobs just caught in my throat. "Shhh... Baby, it's all gonna be OK! I promise. Don't be so upset. We'll make this work."
I batted my wet eyelashes up at him. "I love you." Blinking a few times up at the ceiling, one glimmering tear shone in the moonlight, emotions unknown surging like electricity.
Monday, April 18, 2011
What Would Have Happened Pt. 1 contd.
(Listen to Crazy, Katie Herzig)
Our final school semester for the year was almost over. Maddening hours spent the last few weeks before graduation had put Tyler into a frenzy. I couldn't seem to keep him focused for anything. We spent every free hour together, either playing volleyball, studying, or just sitting out underneath the stars, listening to the beautiful silence. In a way, I almost felt like he was distancing himself. There was something just under the surface that he was determined not to tell me, straining across the wordless gap surrounding us.
Tyler bounded down the hallway, trying to gauge Ash's local. "Hey, we need to talk."
Timidly, she brushed her finger on his chest, her mind raced to conclude the unknown. "What's going on?" Hesitation filtered out the fear.
"Nothing. I just need to ask you something."
Tiptoeing to the end of the hallway, Ash slipped through the screen door on her back porch. She could view Tyler's truck in the shadows of the street, his engine lightly humming.
Applying light pressure, she eased the door to close. Sweeping her gaze over him, she managed to make out the twinkles behind his dimmed expression. "You don't look too happy."
He shrugged. "I guess I'm not."
"Want to talk about it now?"
"There's not much to really say. But I need to know what you think, first."
The silence spoke for her, revealing too little.
He cleared his throat. "I got accepted to UA on a football scholarship. I thought it was going to be a long shot, but they want me. I be gone for awhile, but its soon enough that i won't get to see you for much longer. They start practicing toward the end of next month. I want to know how you feel about this. I mean, you're gonna be here, and i'll be down there. It's about 7 hours away. I just don't know how...."
"How we would make it that far apart?"
"Yeah."
"I guess we'll find out. But honestly, i think it's awesome you got accepted. That's been you and your dad's thing now for..ages. I feel like the world would have gone out of alignment if you hadn't gotten accepted there."
"You really mean it? Are you really, REALLY, happy? Or are you just saying this to make me happy?"
Batting proud lashes at him, she curled into his side. "Now tell me, how many girls can say that their boyfriend is gonna be the star football player for 'Bama?! Not many! Of course I'm excited, baby."
And I really was. I wanted what was best for him. For him to have everything, and for nothing to be out of his reach was all that mattered. In the back of my mind, the sense of loss had already started registering, but I pushed it away, hoping it would go away with time.
Tyler had made his salutatorian's speech flawlessly, laughter peeling through the gyms auditorium at the right moments, tears accompanying his brief reminisces. Barbeque was eaten, cake was split, and overall jovialty was shared over Tyler's acceptance. Sitting back, Ash day dreamed, adoring the love of her life from a distance, watching him interact with the different members from his class and family.
Our final school semester for the year was almost over. Maddening hours spent the last few weeks before graduation had put Tyler into a frenzy. I couldn't seem to keep him focused for anything. We spent every free hour together, either playing volleyball, studying, or just sitting out underneath the stars, listening to the beautiful silence. In a way, I almost felt like he was distancing himself. There was something just under the surface that he was determined not to tell me, straining across the wordless gap surrounding us.
Tyler bounded down the hallway, trying to gauge Ash's local. "Hey, we need to talk."
Timidly, she brushed her finger on his chest, her mind raced to conclude the unknown. "What's going on?" Hesitation filtered out the fear.
"Nothing. I just need to ask you something."
Tiptoeing to the end of the hallway, Ash slipped through the screen door on her back porch. She could view Tyler's truck in the shadows of the street, his engine lightly humming.
Applying light pressure, she eased the door to close. Sweeping her gaze over him, she managed to make out the twinkles behind his dimmed expression. "You don't look too happy."
He shrugged. "I guess I'm not."
"Want to talk about it now?"
"There's not much to really say. But I need to know what you think, first."
The silence spoke for her, revealing too little.
He cleared his throat. "I got accepted to UA on a football scholarship. I thought it was going to be a long shot, but they want me. I be gone for awhile, but its soon enough that i won't get to see you for much longer. They start practicing toward the end of next month. I want to know how you feel about this. I mean, you're gonna be here, and i'll be down there. It's about 7 hours away. I just don't know how...."
"How we would make it that far apart?"
"Yeah."
"I guess we'll find out. But honestly, i think it's awesome you got accepted. That's been you and your dad's thing now for..ages. I feel like the world would have gone out of alignment if you hadn't gotten accepted there."
"You really mean it? Are you really, REALLY, happy? Or are you just saying this to make me happy?"
Batting proud lashes at him, she curled into his side. "Now tell me, how many girls can say that their boyfriend is gonna be the star football player for 'Bama?! Not many! Of course I'm excited, baby."
And I really was. I wanted what was best for him. For him to have everything, and for nothing to be out of his reach was all that mattered. In the back of my mind, the sense of loss had already started registering, but I pushed it away, hoping it would go away with time.
Tyler had made his salutatorian's speech flawlessly, laughter peeling through the gyms auditorium at the right moments, tears accompanying his brief reminisces. Barbeque was eaten, cake was split, and overall jovialty was shared over Tyler's acceptance. Sitting back, Ash day dreamed, adoring the love of her life from a distance, watching him interact with the different members from his class and family.
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
What Could have Happened pt. 1 contd.
"Pssst! Hey! Let me see your notes."
Startled, Ash swiveled the direction of the voice. "What?"
Fair blue eyes pierced hers. "Let me see your notes," Ty recanted with an upturned lip.
Timidly passing them, she was thankful she had managed not to scribble Ty's name all over the page's edge. He caught her eye again to hand the sheets back. "Thanks," he whispered, wiggling his eyebrows.
Ducking her head, she tried to copy down all the babble concerning the appropriate uses of the adverbial clause.
To Ash's dismay, she heard another hiss being whispered from Ty's desk. A small folded gum wrapper tumbled onto her lap. Gingerly inspecting the material, she followed the imperative command of "Open Me." Peeling the corners apart, the words she read caught her breath.
"Your eyes get sparkly when you do that."
Chancing a peek at her tormentor, what she saw knocked all sense out of the day. Darkened sapphire eyes boring right into her own chocolate brown ones told all too much about how Ty was feeling at the moment. Scared, she quickly diverted her thoughts.
It took everything in her to breath after that.
Days lumped into weeks as time passed, and steadily the new relationship grew from its flirtatious banter to something else entirely. Deep down, Ashton could feel the new intimacy building between Tyler and herself. Time spent away from him was spent daydreaming of their future, and often she was shocked by the intensity of her own emotions. Something had transpired, and it was binding him forever into the corridors of her innocent heart.
What used to be her locker before her now took on the distinction of a pair of hands, darkening her vision. A slow smile crinkled against her soft features.
"Guess who?" The laughter in his voice was barely in check.
"Hmm. Let me guess. Do yiou have honey colored curls?"
Low chuckles rumbled from his chest. "Well, some do call them my golden locks."
"Do you have blue eyes?"
"That's actually dependent on the day. Right now i think they're a little gray."
"Are you hilariously funny with very odd talents?"
"Do you think you could ask anymore questions? I'm not vegetable, mineral, or anything else off of your list of 20 questions. Just say it, good lord." Tyler bit back a laugh. She was cute. Definitely cute.
"Lemme see.. Could it be Tyler? 'Cause he's the only one i know who could fit all those requirements." Quivering with laughter, her mouth was suddenly caught up with his. The sensation he gave her never grew old with every touch pulsing pleasure through her veins.
"Did you notice your ends were purple?" Ringlets curled around his fingertips.
"What?" She gasped, snatching her colored flaxen waves from his grasp. "When did this happen?"
"Last period when i got bored. It just looked so tempting. Your hair looks really pretty like this... and i just wanted to touch it."
There was that feeling again. I couldn't help it. Everything he did made me love him more. He did silly things like that all the time, and somehow i knew deep down inside he was right for me. He was perfect in my eyes, and at the time i believed he was my Prince Charming.
You know, he would even catch me unaware sometimes, when i really wasn't paying attention, and would lean over and sing sweet songs in my ear. It didn't matter the moment, or what i was doing, what i had on-- he always had a song for me.
Lazily dreaming away the minutes at the picnic tables outside school was where Tyler found Ashton. Sifting her wheat curls through his fingers, he watched the fine tendrils dance in the breeze. A secret smile twisted his lips. It was the smile used only in his most vulnerable of moments: the one he used whenever Ashton crossed his mind. Gently brushing her hair away from the slope of her neck, he softly hummed the bars of her favorite song against her ear.
Lowering her lashes, she memorized the moment, content to stay in that spot for eternity. It was perfect in all of its elements.
There was something to the trust they shared. It was being able to be moldable together. It was trust in the other to be the strength one needed to have for the confidence they both possessed. As lovely as the moment happened, however, Ashton couldn't help but ask herself just what Tyler felt. She knew, even in the smallest of instances, that she loved him. Never had she confessed it, but never had he given any verbal inclination that he might be one to love her.
Yes. She felt his love. Saw his love in his actions. Felt his love in the attraction he spoke of to her. But did he feel it too?
Exams were coming up. The pressure for high grades mounted. Exhausted due to absolutely no sleep, Ashton let her head fall onto her locker. Something rattled from within the metal casing. Frowning, she lifted the latch to pry the door open.
The sight astounded her. Taped to every tangible surface revealed a note of somekind from Ty. Song lyrics he made habit to sing, and descriptive memoirs of the times they had shared. Even details from the Christmas party they had attended. Blurred vision gave way to tears. Joy emitted from her core. That was what it really felt like. An explosion, perhaps, of tiny sun shine rays and beams bouncing off every corner.
Eyes brimming, she sought him out in the small, gathering crowd. There he stood, eyes holding a new intensity. His orbs dark with a fierceness she'd never witnessed before.
She stared up at him. That moment would seal their roles forever.
I thought he was going to. Hoped he would have. Right there in front of everybody. But he didn't. At the perfect second in time - when that ethereal moment passed and I felt eternity sucker punch me in the stomach - someone called his name. Just like a bad chick flick.
Our gazes were still locked, but slowly he pulled back, and faced the direction of the name sayer. Clearing his throat, Ty answered her. All in the same instant I knew love and hatred as potentedly placed on the appropriate heads.
Life went on as normal. In some ways we were bound by an unspoken word. Something had happened. Just neither of us knew what. But i felt it was coming to a close before i was ready for it to even begin. Unfortunately, the close was coming faster than i had hoped.
Startled, Ash swiveled the direction of the voice. "What?"
Fair blue eyes pierced hers. "Let me see your notes," Ty recanted with an upturned lip.
Timidly passing them, she was thankful she had managed not to scribble Ty's name all over the page's edge. He caught her eye again to hand the sheets back. "Thanks," he whispered, wiggling his eyebrows.
Ducking her head, she tried to copy down all the babble concerning the appropriate uses of the adverbial clause.
To Ash's dismay, she heard another hiss being whispered from Ty's desk. A small folded gum wrapper tumbled onto her lap. Gingerly inspecting the material, she followed the imperative command of "Open Me." Peeling the corners apart, the words she read caught her breath.
"Your eyes get sparkly when you do that."
Chancing a peek at her tormentor, what she saw knocked all sense out of the day. Darkened sapphire eyes boring right into her own chocolate brown ones told all too much about how Ty was feeling at the moment. Scared, she quickly diverted her thoughts.
It took everything in her to breath after that.
Days lumped into weeks as time passed, and steadily the new relationship grew from its flirtatious banter to something else entirely. Deep down, Ashton could feel the new intimacy building between Tyler and herself. Time spent away from him was spent daydreaming of their future, and often she was shocked by the intensity of her own emotions. Something had transpired, and it was binding him forever into the corridors of her innocent heart.
What used to be her locker before her now took on the distinction of a pair of hands, darkening her vision. A slow smile crinkled against her soft features.
"Guess who?" The laughter in his voice was barely in check.
"Hmm. Let me guess. Do yiou have honey colored curls?"
Low chuckles rumbled from his chest. "Well, some do call them my golden locks."
"Do you have blue eyes?"
"That's actually dependent on the day. Right now i think they're a little gray."
"Are you hilariously funny with very odd talents?"
"Do you think you could ask anymore questions? I'm not vegetable, mineral, or anything else off of your list of 20 questions. Just say it, good lord." Tyler bit back a laugh. She was cute. Definitely cute.
"Lemme see.. Could it be Tyler? 'Cause he's the only one i know who could fit all those requirements." Quivering with laughter, her mouth was suddenly caught up with his. The sensation he gave her never grew old with every touch pulsing pleasure through her veins.
"Did you notice your ends were purple?" Ringlets curled around his fingertips.
"What?" She gasped, snatching her colored flaxen waves from his grasp. "When did this happen?"
"Last period when i got bored. It just looked so tempting. Your hair looks really pretty like this... and i just wanted to touch it."
There was that feeling again. I couldn't help it. Everything he did made me love him more. He did silly things like that all the time, and somehow i knew deep down inside he was right for me. He was perfect in my eyes, and at the time i believed he was my Prince Charming.
You know, he would even catch me unaware sometimes, when i really wasn't paying attention, and would lean over and sing sweet songs in my ear. It didn't matter the moment, or what i was doing, what i had on-- he always had a song for me.
Lazily dreaming away the minutes at the picnic tables outside school was where Tyler found Ashton. Sifting her wheat curls through his fingers, he watched the fine tendrils dance in the breeze. A secret smile twisted his lips. It was the smile used only in his most vulnerable of moments: the one he used whenever Ashton crossed his mind. Gently brushing her hair away from the slope of her neck, he softly hummed the bars of her favorite song against her ear.
Lowering her lashes, she memorized the moment, content to stay in that spot for eternity. It was perfect in all of its elements.
There was something to the trust they shared. It was being able to be moldable together. It was trust in the other to be the strength one needed to have for the confidence they both possessed. As lovely as the moment happened, however, Ashton couldn't help but ask herself just what Tyler felt. She knew, even in the smallest of instances, that she loved him. Never had she confessed it, but never had he given any verbal inclination that he might be one to love her.
Yes. She felt his love. Saw his love in his actions. Felt his love in the attraction he spoke of to her. But did he feel it too?
Exams were coming up. The pressure for high grades mounted. Exhausted due to absolutely no sleep, Ashton let her head fall onto her locker. Something rattled from within the metal casing. Frowning, she lifted the latch to pry the door open.
The sight astounded her. Taped to every tangible surface revealed a note of somekind from Ty. Song lyrics he made habit to sing, and descriptive memoirs of the times they had shared. Even details from the Christmas party they had attended. Blurred vision gave way to tears. Joy emitted from her core. That was what it really felt like. An explosion, perhaps, of tiny sun shine rays and beams bouncing off every corner.
Eyes brimming, she sought him out in the small, gathering crowd. There he stood, eyes holding a new intensity. His orbs dark with a fierceness she'd never witnessed before.
She stared up at him. That moment would seal their roles forever.
I thought he was going to. Hoped he would have. Right there in front of everybody. But he didn't. At the perfect second in time - when that ethereal moment passed and I felt eternity sucker punch me in the stomach - someone called his name. Just like a bad chick flick.
Our gazes were still locked, but slowly he pulled back, and faced the direction of the name sayer. Clearing his throat, Ty answered her. All in the same instant I knew love and hatred as potentedly placed on the appropriate heads.
Life went on as normal. In some ways we were bound by an unspoken word. Something had happened. Just neither of us knew what. But i felt it was coming to a close before i was ready for it to even begin. Unfortunately, the close was coming faster than i had hoped.
What Could Have Happened pt. 1
Prologue
"Do you love me?" He pulled her close.
"Silly boy, you know that I do." Her face belied the nervous flutter of her heart.
"Would you do something for me?" He continued to draw her towards him.
"You know I would do anything for you."
"You know what I want."
She stopped. "I don't know if i could do that."
"But i'm leaving in two days! I won't be back for a while. Don't you want to make this special for me? Something i'll never forget?"
"Of course I do, I just--"
"Come on! Just this once. Please?"
She started to protest, but he kissed her, stopping all refusals in her throat.
He pulled her all the way to him. He kissed her again.
She didn't walk away.
Part One.
"Ashton Harvey! Wait up there, Princess!"
The April sun came out from the clouds, chasing some fo the left-over chill away. Ash peered over the rims of her sunglasses at the three male classmates scrambling into her car.
"What do you think you're doing?" Scowling at the ringleader, she tried to stop the grin breaking across her berry lips.
"We're just trying to catch a ride on the A-train! What else?"
Giggles escaped as loud whoops came from the back seat.
"All right, all right. Where to, boys?"
OK. Pause. This is where i interrupt to narrate my story. That was the first day that Tyler, the ringleader, had ever paid any real attention to me. Sure, we had the casual greeting in the hallway, but it was nothing more spectacular than that. Absolutely nothing worth cataloguing in the "Top-Ten-High School- Sweethearts" section of the yearbook.
Of course, I was flattered. He was Tyler Kingsley, star football player, teacher's pet, and voted 'Most Likely to Succeed' by his Senior class. I, on the other hand, was the dubbed brainiac who had never been on a date throughout her entire hig school experience.It's not that I was ugly. I wasn't. I just had tendencies to make things... awkward.
It was the first day of Spring break, and i was headed home from my first gallavant day on the town with my school posse. He had seen me leaving the Cafe downtown, and had caught me at the red light in the Town Square.
Flattered, i was willing to do anything for the attention. 'Anything' that night didn't turn out to be too extravagant. We dtopped his friends off and went to the local bike park. Chatting for a bit, we eventually ran into some of his friends where he made a quick goodbye. There was nothing for me to do but go home.
"Hello?" Rubbing sleep from her eyes, the phone finally made it to her ear.
"Hey, Ash. Tyler here. What're you doing?
Searching in vain for a light switch, she mumbled, "Uhm, I was sleeping. But now i'm talking to you."
"I feel special, you waking up to talk to me. Say, uh, sorry to have left you like that in the park. I twas just..you know.."
"Really, it's ok. I understand." Tingling bursts of crimson carressed her cheeks. "Maybe another time."
"Another time. Yeah, sounds good. Night Ashton." Click.
"OK class, what we have in your glasses is the..."
"So he really called you?" Ashton's best friend Lana speculated.
"Yes. Do you want to check my call log?"
"No. It's just weird." Tossing lenghty tawny curls over her shoulder, she turned her attention to her notes.
"I know." Pressing against the lab table, she mulled over the glass contents compared to her in-class notes. Something wasn't adding up..
Wait, what was on her cheek? Slowly moving the back of her hand against the flesh of her cheek, she pulled her hand away from the wet that had been indadvertently placed there.
"Oh my gosh! What was that?" Frantically tipping her head to the side she managed to wipe all the contents from her face. "What the heck--" Flit!
Droplets of water flicked into her ear, gaining a severe head shake to escape the feeling.
"Ha! Sorry Ash, but you should have seen the look that just took over your face. It was awesome!" The handsome Tyler doubled over in hysterical laughter. "Really, it was amazing!"
Something was softly starting to pull at the gentle strings of her delicate heart. Trying to dispel any blush from her face, she smoothed the remaining water plops from her face. Maybe he was starting to like her.
Hi. Me again. Ok, so, seriously, ar this point I had already decided that i was going to have a crush on Tyler, whether he ever acknowledged me or not. And i had convinced myself that he liked me at least a little bit. I mean, why else would he have acted like this? Not many girls were the object of his playful, flirty behavior. I didn't know or even really care. I wanted whatever he had to give me in whatever form it happened to come in.
I thought it might be good to mention that even though Ty was a Senior and I was a Junior, we had almost all of the same classes. We attended a progressive program school which thought it was better to mix the learning groups in a rotation of classes to further diversity among minds. So as you can imagine, i was left quite often to do nothing but stare at the back of the head that had captured the immediate attention of my loves interest. Pathetic? Why, yes, but the true story.
"Do you love me?" He pulled her close.
"Silly boy, you know that I do." Her face belied the nervous flutter of her heart.
"Would you do something for me?" He continued to draw her towards him.
"You know I would do anything for you."
"You know what I want."
She stopped. "I don't know if i could do that."
"But i'm leaving in two days! I won't be back for a while. Don't you want to make this special for me? Something i'll never forget?"
"Of course I do, I just--"
"Come on! Just this once. Please?"
She started to protest, but he kissed her, stopping all refusals in her throat.
He pulled her all the way to him. He kissed her again.
She didn't walk away.
Part One.
"Ashton Harvey! Wait up there, Princess!"
The April sun came out from the clouds, chasing some fo the left-over chill away. Ash peered over the rims of her sunglasses at the three male classmates scrambling into her car.
"What do you think you're doing?" Scowling at the ringleader, she tried to stop the grin breaking across her berry lips.
"We're just trying to catch a ride on the A-train! What else?"
Giggles escaped as loud whoops came from the back seat.
"All right, all right. Where to, boys?"
OK. Pause. This is where i interrupt to narrate my story. That was the first day that Tyler, the ringleader, had ever paid any real attention to me. Sure, we had the casual greeting in the hallway, but it was nothing more spectacular than that. Absolutely nothing worth cataloguing in the "Top-Ten-High School- Sweethearts" section of the yearbook.
Of course, I was flattered. He was Tyler Kingsley, star football player, teacher's pet, and voted 'Most Likely to Succeed' by his Senior class. I, on the other hand, was the dubbed brainiac who had never been on a date throughout her entire hig school experience.It's not that I was ugly. I wasn't. I just had tendencies to make things... awkward.
It was the first day of Spring break, and i was headed home from my first gallavant day on the town with my school posse. He had seen me leaving the Cafe downtown, and had caught me at the red light in the Town Square.
Flattered, i was willing to do anything for the attention. 'Anything' that night didn't turn out to be too extravagant. We dtopped his friends off and went to the local bike park. Chatting for a bit, we eventually ran into some of his friends where he made a quick goodbye. There was nothing for me to do but go home.
"Hello?" Rubbing sleep from her eyes, the phone finally made it to her ear.
"Hey, Ash. Tyler here. What're you doing?
Searching in vain for a light switch, she mumbled, "Uhm, I was sleeping. But now i'm talking to you."
"I feel special, you waking up to talk to me. Say, uh, sorry to have left you like that in the park. I twas just..you know.."
"Really, it's ok. I understand." Tingling bursts of crimson carressed her cheeks. "Maybe another time."
"Another time. Yeah, sounds good. Night Ashton." Click.
"OK class, what we have in your glasses is the..."
"So he really called you?" Ashton's best friend Lana speculated.
"Yes. Do you want to check my call log?"
"No. It's just weird." Tossing lenghty tawny curls over her shoulder, she turned her attention to her notes.
"I know." Pressing against the lab table, she mulled over the glass contents compared to her in-class notes. Something wasn't adding up..
Wait, what was on her cheek? Slowly moving the back of her hand against the flesh of her cheek, she pulled her hand away from the wet that had been indadvertently placed there.
"Oh my gosh! What was that?" Frantically tipping her head to the side she managed to wipe all the contents from her face. "What the heck--" Flit!
Droplets of water flicked into her ear, gaining a severe head shake to escape the feeling.
"Ha! Sorry Ash, but you should have seen the look that just took over your face. It was awesome!" The handsome Tyler doubled over in hysterical laughter. "Really, it was amazing!"
Something was softly starting to pull at the gentle strings of her delicate heart. Trying to dispel any blush from her face, she smoothed the remaining water plops from her face. Maybe he was starting to like her.
Hi. Me again. Ok, so, seriously, ar this point I had already decided that i was going to have a crush on Tyler, whether he ever acknowledged me or not. And i had convinced myself that he liked me at least a little bit. I mean, why else would he have acted like this? Not many girls were the object of his playful, flirty behavior. I didn't know or even really care. I wanted whatever he had to give me in whatever form it happened to come in.
I thought it might be good to mention that even though Ty was a Senior and I was a Junior, we had almost all of the same classes. We attended a progressive program school which thought it was better to mix the learning groups in a rotation of classes to further diversity among minds. So as you can imagine, i was left quite often to do nothing but stare at the back of the head that had captured the immediate attention of my loves interest. Pathetic? Why, yes, but the true story.
Monday, February 21, 2011
Saturday, February 19, 2011
Series of the Fortunate
it's easier to hope for that perfect person to come along, than it is to realize that the one you're meant to be with may be the reason you're carrying around so much baggage already.
it's easier to deal with the fantasy than it is with the present state of reality.
you've already written them off.
you've already talked yourself out of the intial feelings.
and all the heartstrings that were pulled you've gently twisted back into place.
you ran up, so excited to see them, threw your arms around them and whispered 'i love you' oh so gently against their neck..
then shrink back into that shell of protectiveness. the wall you've been trying to pull down suddenly gets slammed with mortar and brick chips as you scurry to scrape all the support back into place.
you talk yourself out of any feeling.
it doesn't matter.
they are plenty of others out there just like him.
then you slowly talk yourself into hating them, for hate is easier to accomplish than love.
why? because....
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
it's unconditional.
and thats what we have a problem with.
it's not us being hurt.
or self preservationalism.
its the inability to cope with faults that you find present in the potential relationship.
its how we react to the knowledge of imperfection.
its how we just realized,
that we do miss that one person we found so imperfect.
its how we remember-
staying up late and all those discussions,
and then falling asleep to the sound of the other persons breathing.
its how we could count the eyelashes on their perfect lids and never grow tired of it,
because somehow you found it worthwhile.
it's wanting to reach out,
and think maybe there are such things as soul mates.
and maybe love does exist outside of Cindereslla's fairytale.
but who knows.
maybe there could be a revolution.
and we could witness the new series of fortunate events.
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