mood: frustrated

song: silence

locale: daybed in the drearyness

frustration can't even begin to describe the feelings i've just suffered. the most inconceivable of things to happen on a day like today.. it just makes me angry. and i have still much more to do. i need not to be worried. there is always another day, another start to life just waiting around the corner, i just haven't found it yet.

arrival at any certain time is always questionable in this day and age. we are met with too many variables, and not enough stationary articles to keep the body grounded for more than two minutes of a time.

i miss my mum. and my papa. neither are available for chatting today.):

i am, however, excited that i have an interview tomorrow at Victoria's Secret. its beautiful to me. i can't really explain why.. but i just find it to be so. maybe its because it so brash, or its because they flaunt the form of the female body, and i'm so attracted to the idea of being beautiful in every sense.

beauty to me is someitmes different than what it would be to others. conceptual art, i have decided, is my favorite. or post impressionism. i love art. i love color, and vibrancy, and challenges and form and line and structure and concept behind matter and everything thats the least bit..odd.

maybe you couldn't tell. doesn't really matter. i just go for whats distinguishably classy.

xoxox

The eye to the soul gazes at me through the trees,

Mimicking the whispers my lover tells me.

Come hither from here,

Come thither to me,

Hold open your hand as we catch gentle breeze.

Softly they caress,

Special care to my bosom,

Lulling me into the chasm of dreams.

Frame me with words of a soft moon kiss,

Carry me tenderly across angry sea.

On wings of your light I see without cause,

Falling to bliss in blind single slumber.

My tears have gone darkly,

Pale memories to hold.

Sing to me sweet,

The lullaby of Fear,

And tie me to rhythm I no longer hear.

mood: complacent

locale: daybed in the sun

song: lullaby

i've lost all precepts of life. the former idols that i had put up now seem so useless in comparison to the gods constructed now.

as i see it, animal crackers have become my new best friends. oh btw, dont i look simply dashing in that picture? well, obviously, it isn't me. but it is, its like our souls have connected somehow.

have you ever stopped to listen to the melody of the grass blades? or the drum of the birds wing? or listened to the whispered tales of love passed between the branches of the graceful birch trees?

.."i've got, da da da inside my head and i play songs back to back before i go to bed.."

i feel so neglectful when it comes to this page. really, its quite sad. i love to write down the musings of my day when it comes to this spot.. i just rarely ever take the time.

i've started a small book of dark poetry and scribblings. it helps to pass the lonesomeness and the feelings of self pity. when i think of someone else having a horrible death of the life of a loved one ripped away, somehow it helps. morbid? maybe. but you should maybe pick it up. just buy a small journal and scibble in it the dealings of your heart at the hour. you'll be amazed at what you find.

babies awake. must vanquish. Love.